From Lukewarm to Devoted

After navigating through a challenging year in 2023 that shook my faith, I’ve been determined to turn things around in 2024. My focus is set on God, steering clear of life’s noise and troubles. Like many others, I kicked off the year with a 21-day fast, seeking a fresh start. This time, however, the devil’s tricks almost sidetracked me.. But God.

On day one of my fast, I woke up full of hope! Armed with my Bible and Jackie Hill Perry’s “Upon Awakening” devotional, I was ready to dive in. Yet, old habits die hard. While praying to begin my reading, as is habit for me, I dozed back to sleep. The enemy seized the opportunity, planting inappropriate thoughts in my dreams. Unaware, I indulged in those activities in my dream until my alarm jolted me awake. I was in shock that had just happened in my mind! Especially considering the fact that I was literally on DAY ONE of my fast,  and trying to stay focused on God. In that moment, the Holy Spirit reminded me to take every thought captive (2 Corin. 10:5). 

Instead of dwelling on guilt and condemning myself, as I would’ve in the past, I grieved my sin and immediately repented. I asked God for forgiveness and I also forgave myself. I reminded myself there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Rom. 8:1).  That God had already forgiven me and to wallow in guilt or shame serves nobody, but the devil (and we don’t do that around here. As for me and my house we will serve the Lord, period!).

God, in that moment, did not see my sin or weakness; He saw His beloved daughter with a Bible and devotional, desiring to seek Him and His righteousness. He saw my heart’s hunger and thirst for Jesus, and offered grace and mercy for my shortcomings.

This experience reminded me that the devil is scared and busy. He dreads people turning from sin, repenting, choosing Jesus, and pursuing righteousness. That’s why the Bible says he prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour (Peter 5:8). I’m sure he thought he could devour me, but jokes on him.

After repenting, I recognized this as clear spiritual warfare, intending to draw me back into a cycle of sin, sexual immorality, guilt, and shame. But, I KNOW I have already been freed from that, and who the Son set free is free indeed (John 8:36). So, suited and booted with the full armor of God, I went to war! I prayed over my mind, declaring the enemy’s schemes and tricks canceled, In The Name of Jesus. I also affirmed that I have power and a sound mind (2 Tim. 1:17). The devil tried to use my sin against me, but he’s already defeated, and victory is mine through Christ.

We all sin intentionally or unintentionally, and that’s why salvation is so beautiful. Through repentance, we are reconciled back to the Father, and He no longer sees our sin. He saved us from sin, and now views us through the lens of Jesus’ sacrifice that has given us a spotless record. During this experience, I asked The Lord to purify my heart and mind. I asked Him to renew my mind so that I only think of things that are noble, pure, lovely, and right… which led me back to Jesus. The only one who is righteous. It all goes back to Jesus. It will always go back to Jesus. Always, go back to Jesus. 

 This is me going back to Jesus, for the millionth trillionth time. (I love it here💕)